Why 2009 Was A Good Year For Me

This year brought me a lot of new experiences and amazing moments. I celebrated my 30th birthday in July and even though my party didn't end up how I wanted it to I was happy that I could spend it with people I cared about. Not to mention, the Fender Prophecy that Danny bought me. It was one of the most thoughtful gifts anyone has ever given me. (if you don't know, I have played bass since I was 15. For about 4 years I was in the band, Six to Eight Mathematics, and used a Prophecy that was given to me as a gift by a very close friend. About 5 years ago, we had a disagreement which ended our friendship. He took the bass back and refused to remain in contact with me. It was the only bass I was comfortable with so since then I wasn't able to play. They are also very hard to find which explains why I never had it again) So the fact that Danny searched and found one was a romantic gesture. I was so excited! Besides my 30th, I was lucky to celebrate my friends, Valerie and Meg, 30th birthdays as well. To watch these two ladies grow up beside me for the last 19 years is awesome.

In June, Danny moved in and it was the best decision we made. He is a great guy to live with. We also celebrated our one year anniversary on August 11. To reach one year together was a blessing. I am lucky to have him in my life and am grateful for every day he is with me. And like every relationship, we had our ups and downs but got through them with ease. To start 2010 with him by my side is an adventure all on its own.

October brought me Maine. I have been wanting to go there for years and finally my wish came true. Danny and I ventured out to Acadia with Olive for the 10 hour drive. What a road trip it was! It felt like my first family vacation. A full week filled with new experiences, beautiful views, silence and lots of time to rest. Thats what I call a vacation. Its something I will always remember and cherish.

Looking for a job has been an issue for the last couple of years. Its just getting worse and worse out there. Being a designer is tough. Especially, in a horrible economy. I am grateful for the freelance jobs I was able to work on and for the unemployment that got me through it all.

My father and I haven't had a normal parent/child relationship. Not having him in my life until I was 21 was a very big life changing moment. We remained in each other's lives for a couple of years then lost touch. This year has brought us back together again and I am very happy for that. My dad has had a very colorful life and is lucky to be healthy and alive. I am proud of him for turning his life around and moving forward with a positive view on things. Not only do I talk to him almost every day but I was able to help him design his new apartment and get his life back on track. I am thankful to have him in my life again.

Now for the little things:

- I have a lot of ink done but none of which was completed. Thanks to Nick Arena at the Devil's Rose Tattoo shop I was able to get my right leg done! You can imagine how excited I was to finally have a completed piece. I am so impressed and satisfied with the final results and happy that I have a limb dedicated to one of my favorite artists, Jeremy Fish.

- I am not a big fan of tv but am happy for the new shows that started this year: Glee and Flash Forward are my favorites. I am also excited to see the last season of Nip Tuck. Though this does not make me happy, this show is so great I am sad to see it go but I know the last episodes will be fucking crazy!

- Thanks to Facebook I was able to get in touch with some people from my past. From old loves to close friends, I am glad to know that they are all happy and healthy. People come into your life for a reason and when years fly by and they appear again don't take it for granted.

- I was able to finally update and redesign my apartment this fall. I am always thinking of new ways to change things and reinvent my living space. This time with a little more money we were able to get some new furniture and a new tv. The place looks stunning and I am so grateful we got it all done!

- Of course I am always grateful for the holidays and being able to spend it with my family. They are the best people around and it would not be the same without them.

So you can see by the things I mentioned that I am a thankful girl with a lot of positivity surrounding me. I have to be honest though and say that the most eye opening and life changing experience for me this year was choosing to be a vegetarian. This change was a result of lots of reading and time. For years I have always thought about not eating meat. Especially, since I love animals and support animal rights. I hate that I was a contradiction for most of my life. I will admit it. When I was young I was so consumed with the issues in my life that the world around me wasn't reality. Not that I was selfish, but my life has brought me many things to focus on and the food industry was not one of them. Being an art student, I had endless projects and sleepless nights. My work was my focus and most of the time my work was inspired by my life experiences. Yet, more to be consumed by.

I will say, that for a long time I was uncomfortable about eating animals. I was never a big meat eater anyway, mostly eating chicken, but there was always that voice saying "don't do that" in the back of my head. I was even grossed out by raw meat and didn't enjoy touching it. (which I still am) Forget about even picturing slaughterhouses and dead animals, the thought of these images made my cry. Not until I was out on my own was I more involved with knowing what I was eating and where my food came from. I started reading books on natural cleaners and organic foods and it changed my life. The year 2006 was when I started to make things happen.

Now, on the last day of 2009, I am so proud to say that I am meat-free, corn-free and on a strict organic diet. I have taken the steps that were necessary for me to be here today. All those years of wondering and not being fully aware brought me down the path of seeking knowledge and making changes that matter. The truth is, this planet is our responsibility. We were put here to live our lives and replenish the earth that gave us life. Its no one else's job but ours. As children and young adults we aren't fully aware of the horrible things going on in the world. People keep these horrible things far away from our ears and eyes creating this naive barrier to reality. This needs to change. As we grow up, that barrier starts to crumble because we are now living and working in the real world. As much as the government and big corporations try to keep that barrier from breaking, we eventually break through.

I love to cook. Always have. The women in my family all have the "food gene" and I am happy to be a part of that. There is one key ingredient to being a true cook or chef and that is to know where your food comes from. If you want to make healthy, yummy dishes you must use the best ingredients. That's a fact. Most of the food people make are not up to these standards. The "stuff" they are using are either processed chemicals or tortured, unhealthy animals. These do not make a good meal. Nor do they suffice for comfort food. Are you really comfortable about putting shit on the table for your family to eat? Well, thats what you are doing. You might as well give out plates of feces and hope for the best. You can bet I won't be coming over for dinner anytime soon!

I feel that our senses have taken over. Just because something tastes good doesn't mean you have to eat it. Its called greed and millions of you suffer from it. "Who me? Greedy? No!" Yes, you are. So wake up and turn things around. So many living creatures suffer and die just so you can have them on a plate. It seems so worthless. There is no valid reason for eating animals. Nor is there a good reason for eating processed food. You might as well get on your knees and pray to the big corporations who are feeding you. Sadly enough, they are your God.

I started my website, d+eco, to help people be aware of what they are eating and how to help the planet. I have a brain, therefore, I choose to use it. I have a voice and I choose to speak up every moment I can. I am fearless, I choose to act on emotion and good morals and spread the truth no matter what gets in my way. I am an inspiration, I choose to lead others in the revolution towards positive change. I have a heart that dies every time I think of an animal being tortured and people supporting that behavior. I have a soul, I choose to fill it with positivity and warmth and help the unaware and the weak. And despite all my anger and disgust for the human race, I still have hope for all of us.

So for 2010, I ask that you all get the facts and know the truth. Stop being selfish and greedy for once and think about the bigger picture. Take a look at yourself and start making changes. As you kiss your children good night, think about their health and their future. As you go over your bills for the month, see what you can live without and start spending where it counts. When you go food shopping make sure you read labels and if you don't know what it is than don't buy it. Explore new ways of cooking and add vegetarian meals to your weekly dinners. Think of all the animals that suffer and choose to help them suffer no more. Support sustainable farming methods and give the "farm" back to the "farmer". Once in awhile, donate to a charity and help make this a better place to live. Teach your children the truth without creating a wall from reality. Stupid, ignorant children are not strong leaders of the future.

This all may seem like so much to some of you. But it really isn't. This is the way we should all be living. These are the choices we should be making. These are the goals we should be setting. We are the human race. We are supposed to be the smartest race of them all. Its time we act like it. Evolve for change.

The Time is Now

Lately, I have been realizing a lot about this country that makes me sick. Its getting really hard for me to see any good anymore. You know there are many people that are oblivious to what is really going on and there are some that are aware but don't care. The others are a mix of people who are making a difference and others that want to make a difference but don't know how. First of all, it is easy to gain information. Besides reading there are a number of documentaries out there that you can rent or buy that will help you get insight into the world around you. I find film to be exciting and easy to follow so I watch a lot of them. I recently saw two that really pushed me over the edge; Blue Gold: World Water Wars and Walmart: The High Cost of Low Price. Both of these are well worth watching and I highly recommend you check them out asap.

I really wasn't truly aware of the water wars going on in the world right now. I personally don't drink tap water because there is fluoride in it. My boyfriend and I have Poland Spring delivered every month just so we could drink and cook with good water. After watching this film we have decided to cancel our plan. As soon as I find a good filter for our sink we will switch over. I want to get one that is safe and good for the environment and that actually works! It took this one film to change my actions. I feel it is important to make change as soon as you can. No procrastinating! Why sit on your ass any longer when you can make a difference today?

What this film has shown me justifies my feelings toward greed and power. Two things that are the root of all evil. Two things that are running our country and others into the fucking ground. This earth has a system folks. We all learned about it in school. Our eco system works just fine when we take care of it. Sadly, we haven't taken care of it in years and we are all seeing the negative results of that today. In simple terms, the earth has a limited amount of water. It will not go forever, especially at this rate. There are major corporations pumping and taking water from other countries, states and towns and making a profit. Forcing governments to privatize their water supply. Who knew? In an ideal world, we could all drink water that comes from our area and it would be safe and toxic free. But this is not the case. We are wasting our water supply more and more each day, plain and simple. Factory and industrial agriculture, housing and technology have affected how our eco system works and slowly but surely there is land everywhere drying up. Scared yet?

There are people out there fighting for their rights. Strong people who choose to fight the system so that they keep their rights and their right for water. In countries like Africa corporations are humiliating and killing their people for money. Can you imagine only having about a bucket a day of water? Having to pay 25 cents to flush your toilet? What if you had a fire and the fire department came and said, "oh well, we don't have the water to put the fire out, sorry". This is what is going on!! It needs to stop now.

I ask you to please see this film and read the book as well. Do more research and learn what you can do to help. If you care about this country and its water supply than I hope you will stand up and fight back. When people join hands and minds they get stronger and louder. Thats we need! We can make a difference but we have to work at it and we have to do it together.

It seems like this country is all about individual profit and gain. I see it everyday and it makes me angry. I am highly against big corporations who do not care about people, the environment and the country. There are a lot out there. One of which is Walmart. I will admit I have shopped there but I was never a huge advocate of the superstore. The only good thing about the place is its prices. But did you ever think of why they are so cheap? Its not reality. But when you are forcing people in China and other countries to work all fucking day for barely nothing under horrible circumstances you can make it your reality I guess. That's Walmart for ya!

This company is essentially the largest in the world and with profits way past the millions no wonder they have so much power! If you love Walmart and support them than here are just a few fun facts that might change your views:

- their employees get paid crap and can't even take care of their families. Never mind, health care. Walmart designed its health plan so that no one could even afford to take it. This resulting in you paying for it! That's right. All these employees are forced to go on government programs that all you taxpayers are paying for. In fact, Walmart suggests that they do!

- It has also been known for racial discrimination and humiliating its employees. Thats a place I want to work!

- If CEO's are making close to $30 million a year and employees are making just under the federal poverty line, I think there is a problem!

- The company is also a supporter of violence. Yep! When you have crimes, rapes and shootings going on in your parking lots worldwide and you do nothing about it than I figure you support this behavior. Having camera's put up is a start. But when you hire no one to work them than what is the point!

- Walmart has been known to hiring illegal immigrants to clean their stores at night and locking them in. Oh thats fun!

- The chain has put hundreds of local business' out of business resulting in cities and towns going bankrupt. What the fuck ever happened the idea of community?

- The amount of money Walmart receives to build new stores is ridiculous. That money could go to schools, funding for programs and local commerce.

You see, if Walmart is making so much money, and it is, you would think they would have no problem paying and respecting their workers what they deserve. You also would think they would pay to have the best security so that consumers would be safe and feel safe shopping at their stores. This is not the case. Their commercials are bullshit and their company morals are not worth a dime. All they care about is money, power and control. If you can't see that than I feel sorry for you.

I for one will not shop at Walmart ever again. There is really no need to when there are a million other stores to shop at. Better ones at that. I am convinced it is evil because the idea was based on one of the major problems in this country. All the CEO's that ever worked their term along the years are assholes and don't have any heart or soul. Modern day slavery is what they are all about and I will not support that. You know, the fact that they have the lowest prices can have a psychological effect on people. You need something, you want it and your going to get it. Good example is Black Friday. The Walmart right by me in Farmingdale had a death due to crowds of people rushing in the store to shop. That poor security guard got stomped on over and over. You people are fucking nuts!! I hope that stupid toy for your kid or that TV you just had to have was worth killing someone for. The whole situation makes me sick.

Look at what our government and big business has done to you all. Its like some of you aren't even humans anymore. Is there any compassion left in the world? Are people strong enough to stand up for themselves these days? Why are we letting this happen? I am strong enough to fight. I know there are others who are strong as well. If we have to be the ones to lead everyone else than so be it. If we have to push the weak to do what is right, than thats fine with me. Don't try to stop me and don't get in my way. When I talk you will listen and I will not stop at ignorance and stupidity. The time is now. Its time to revolt and evolve for change.

http://www.bluegold-worldwaterwars.com/

http://www.walmartmovie.com/

http://wakeupwalmart.com/

What Will We Do Then?

Why do people sometimes shut out information that could help them? Aren't we as humans supposed to grow and evolve as we get older? Change is a part of life. If you want to fight it go ahead but I guarantee your life will not be fulfilled. Why choose a life of ignorance? How could you not want to know what is going on around you? So many questions....

I am at a point in my life where living the best I can and making a difference is important to me. Not that it ever wasn't, but right now I am going through many changes. When I was young it was art, music, school, relationships, drugs...this was my way of learning and experimenting in the world. I sucked in the knowledge like a sponge. I will admit, there were a lot of things I didn't know. Now that I am older the world is a different place to me. I see things in a different view. I realize that there are issues in the world, and this country, that are destroying all of us. Whether you want to agree with me or not, its true. It really upsets me.

I cannot just turn my feelings off nor will I keep my mouth shut because people don't want to listen. I will not give up. I don't preach and I don't force anything on anyone. I just want to share important information with the people around me so that their lives can benefit as well. Is that so wrong? If I won the lottery I bet people wouldn't mind if I gave them some of it. So why can't they take positive information and advice if it will make their lives richer. I don't get it.

Even though I am going vegetarian that doesn't mean I want everyone around me to change as well. But what I do hope for is that what I have to share will encourage people to change. Only you can change who you are. I can only inspire you to be a better person. (and yes, we can all be better people) My beliefs are my beliefs and people can agree or disagree. But facts are facts. If you don't see that than you are ignorant and not as smart as you should be. If you know something is bad for you and you can easily choose the better option why wouldn't you? I really feel bad for people who are so comfortable in how they live that they shut themselves off to the world. No growth, no change and certainly no gain in happiness. This is not the life that I want.

I cannot help expressing myself on something that I am passionate about. I have always been this way. For the last couple of years I have been an advocate of natural and organic foods. I currently live my life the healthiest I have ever lived it. I choose to only put organic, healthy food in my body. Is that wrong? I choose to support animals and their rights instead of eating them. You want to eat meat, fine, than at least eat organic. If not, than you are choosing to eat a tortured, chemical injected, diseased animal. How can people know this and still continue their eating habits? How do they have the heart to support this behavior? I may not have control on what you do with your life but what I do have is the right to not respect your choices. If people only knew how ugly they really are....

I understand that getting involved in such issues will result in disappointment half the time. That will not stop me. It may upset me but that is what I have to deal with. And I do. Honestly, it only makes me want to fight more, share more and speak more. I realize that I will need to give up on some people after I get shot down. Fine. I tried. It only pushes me toward the next person in my journey. I am sick of hearing "I don't care". It's enough already. What if everyone said they didn't care about you. The difference: we humans have power and animals don't. They can't defend themselves or speak up for what they want. Why should they suffer for our taste buds? Why should they be murdered for fashion? What gives us the right to take their lives? There is no reason and we don't have the right!

I just want to make a difference in the world. If I can help my friends and family than I have done some good. I don't mean to preach my beliefs or choices but I will share what I know with the people in my life. I love a lot of people and all I want for them is to be happy and healthy. Most of them are not living this way. Whether they say they are happy or not...ignorance is bliss, I guess. Not my bliss. I live in the real world where it is not such a great place. A world that is craving love and care so much that it is dying. This country needs a wake up call. There are people like me out there doing their part and fighting every day for what they believe in. When change comes around and its enough to really make a difference, our work has been done.

Some people just learn too late. Others may never learn. Diseased minds only add to the negative energy on this planet. We can only help cure them with knowledge and love. Eventually the earth will lose its desire to live. What will we do then?